conscience vs challenge

duality is unescapable.
last week was interesting, but this week was heck of a...shit.
have not finalized decisions yet.

there's a voice telling me that: Shien Yin, you should freaking hell stop this. don't bother living up to other pp's expectations. who cares what other pp thinks about you? you are independent enough to decide how u want to live you life. you are not born to obey, you are born to think, and be happy. and more importantly, you're bound to get sick, physically and mentally,if u keep stressing yourself like that.

the opposite side tells me that: there's so much to learn in the working world, whether u like your job or not. the important thing is to stretch to your maximum potential, getting out of the comfort zone. life challenges makes you matured. so just treat marketing as a job to learn to deal with people, which could be applicable to your future psychology-related job in many ways.

gahh sounds like i have bipolar personality><
anyway that's the problem.
solutions?
family and friends have given me many... and loads of encouragement, sound advise and support too... thanks for that!!
but maybe this is the time i should learn to make decisions by myself, even if i will regret after making it. how could life be successful when there are no regrets??
anyway i've emailed college staffs to ask for advise...
will see how it goes.

may i be blessed with good health and happiness. and may i gain the strength to make wise decisions.

-4:57 pm-